VIC MONTE SPORTS
500* LaSalle -10
I got an email in my inbox one day with a list of jokes aimed at Ivy League schools. I opened the email. Inside it says how many Penn students does it take to change a light bulb? The answer was only one, but he gets six credits for it. If anyone gets that joke, please email me, I would love to hear from you.
In the mean time, a joke we can all laugh about regarding Penn University is their basketball program. The Quakers cover spreads like a hooker that costs a million per hour. In other words, they don't because no one is dumb enough to put money on them or watch them do work in their house. This is probably for the better as they have gone 1-6 at the window this season. The Quakers sit 342ND in overall defense giving up 80 plus per game. For those of you who lost count along the way, there are 347 teams in Division 1 Basketball. If your not laughing yet, your either busy trying to figure out the first joke or your not paying attention. At worst these following numbers should get a snicker. The Quakers only victory this season came over Maryland Baltimore Cty Retrievers who are 1-17 this season a mere shadow of the Quakers 1-11 win loss record. The only cover this season for Penn was against Temple at home as 16 point dogs. The Owls used a Shaq cut out on defense and played on carnival sized rims to make the game entertaining for fans and in the end won by 15. Temple has given up 114 to Duke, 103 to Villanova, 75+ to Navy, Albany, Davidson, Lafayette and Delaware. Of the 75+ group excluding Duke and Villanova, the highest ranked offense is 146TH. To make matters worse for this sad, sad team, they will play without their second guard Tyler Bernardini and starting center Andreas Schreibler. Sitting court-side in street clothes with them will be backups Larry Loughtery and Sean Mullan who are both injured and listed as out.
Now I was here to tell jokes all day, I would continue telling you how bad Penn is. Unfortunately I'm not and I have to get down to business addressing the LaSalle Explorers. Sitting a game above .500 in the A-10, they only sit 2 games back of Xavier in the early stages of league play. They travel to Charlotte after this one on Saturday and want to get this sham of a game over and done with quick. The Explorers hope to get offensive threat, senior guard Kimmani Barrett back in the lineup after missing his last two games. Barrett is scoring 13 points per game this season. This game will serve as good practice for teams leading scorer Rodney Green who has faltered in his last two games shooting only 30% from the floor. Green is scoring 18 per game this year along with 4 assists and 5 boards per contest. Green will do his best impression of Teen Wolf tonight as he will have his way with this Penn defense. The Explorers cashed tickets for backers 2 of their 3 road games this season. They have also beat the number in 13 of their last 17 games against teams with a losing overall record.
The truth is, no one knows what a Quaker really is, no one betting on this game went to an Ivy League school and nobody gets the opening joke. Most importantly though the truth is that the La Salle Explorers are going to absolutely rip apart the Penn Quakers tonight easily covering the 10 points. 500* Syndicate Selection - LaSalle -10