Dave, let's do something fresh here. I think it would be in you and your buddies like Joe, Ace, Russ, Willie, etc's best interest to take this election cycle off. Grab some notepads, some flash cards, and just take notes. Feel free to ask us questions man. We won't bite. Just imagine a world where you aren't wrong all the time and people don't think you're super creepy.
Just imagine that. Let's start your rebuilding process today. First step is to throw out everything you think you know, because it's wrong. Throw out everything you believe, because it's kind of psychotic. And start over. You guys are like fresh little tiny babies just first coming in to this beautiful world. You're completely dependent on us grown ups to lead you in to being civilized and intelligent members of society. So it starts today. AK will teach you how to walk, Vit and Guesser will teach you how to run. At the end of the day, you guys will be much better off.
So first exercise. Close your eyes... remember you're just a little tiny baby so you have to do what I say. Pretend there's some jingle on like B I N G O or something that you can relate to. Imagine a better you. Imagine being able to walk around with out the NSA knowing about it, or being able to go to family gatherings where they actually want to invite you. Imagine all that. Let's get it! You are no longer going to be this tin foil, can collecting loon. You are going to be shown the way. Be prepared!