Nothing will ever beat BTJ's lawnmower story!
NO IT WASNT A SPORTSBOOK THIS TIME I JUST TOOK A BREAK FROM CUTTING MY GRASS SO I HAVE BEEN IN THE HOUSE NOW FOR 45 MINUTES.MY F-CKING LAWNMOWER HAS BEEN STOLEN JESUS CHRIST I AM F-CKING PISSED,I ASKED YURI NEXT DOOR AND HE SAID HE SAW SOME COLORED KID PUT IT INTO HIS TRUCK HE THOUGHT I WAS LETTING HIM USE IT.JESUS F-CKING CHRIST THESE F-CKING RUSSIANS ARE DUMB MOTHER F-CKERS YEH RIGHT LIKE I AM GOING TO LET A NUBIAN USE MY LAWNMOWER ITS GONE GUYS HOW DO I TELL MY WIFE I WAS POSTING IN THE RX AND SOME NIGERIAN STOLE OUR LAWNMOWER SHE WILL THINK I AM GOING BONKERS.THE LAWNMOWER IS 3 YEARS OLD ITS NOT THE MONEY ITS THE FACT THAT MY F-CKING STUPID RUSSIAN NEIGHBOR SAW A NIGERIAN STEAL MY MOWER AND HE JUST STANDS THERE THANKS A F-CKING LOT YURI.THE FRONT OF THE YARD IS HALF DONE NOW WHAT DO I DO.WHY ARE PEOPLE SO STUPID SOMEBODY PLEASE ANSWER ME THIS.I CANT BELIEVE IT I DONT LIKE TO GET ROBBED EVEN IF IT WAS A 6 PACK OF MY CORONAS ITS THE FACT THAT A LITTLE F-CKING BONE HEAD WALKED ONTO MY PROPERTY AND STOLE MY LAWNMOWER WHAT F-CKING BALLS.I CAN SEE IT NOW JIM HOW COME YOU DIDNT FINISH THE LAWN TODAY WELL HONEY I WENT IN TO TALK TO THE SHRINK,SICK GAMBLER,DIMEPLAYERONLY,AND LOU DIAMOND THEN WHEN I WENT BACK OUTSIDE SOMEBODY STOLE THE MOWER,I THINK SHE WILL HAVE ME COMMITTED TO THE MASSACHUSETTS INSTITUTION OF MENTAL PATIENTS BOYS HOW DO YOU EXPLAIN TO HER I TOOK A BREAK TO GO ON THE INTERNET TO TALK TO A BUNCH OF MIS FITS AND THE MOWER WAS STOLEN,THATS IT NO ALLOWANCE AGAIN THIS WEEK ILL HAVE TO GO BUY A NEW LAWNMOWER AND MY WIFE WILL DEDUCT IT FROM MY WEEKLY SALARY.WHY DO I COME INTO THIS FORUM EVERYTIME I DO SOMETHING BAD HAPPENS.
BOYS I HOPE YOU NEVER HAVE RUSSIAN NEIGHBORS MAN THEY ARE THE DUMBEST PEOPLE ON EARTH I SAW A BLACK KID TAKE THE MOWER I THOUGHT HE WAS A FRIEND OF YOURS F-CK YOU YURI
NO IT WASNT A SPORTSBOOK THIS TIME I JUST TOOK A BREAK FROM CUTTING MY GRASS SO I HAVE BEEN IN THE HOUSE NOW FOR 45 MINUTES.MY F-CKING LAWNMOWER HAS BEEN STOLEN JESUS CHRIST I AM F-CKING PISSED,I ASKED YURI NEXT DOOR AND HE SAID HE SAW SOME COLORED KID PUT IT INTO HIS TRUCK HE THOUGHT I WAS LETTING HIM USE IT.JESUS F-CKING CHRIST THESE F-CKING RUSSIANS ARE DUMB MOTHER F-CKERS YEH RIGHT LIKE I AM GOING TO LET A NUBIAN USE MY LAWNMOWER ITS GONE GUYS HOW DO I TELL MY WIFE I WAS POSTING IN THE RX AND SOME NIGERIAN STOLE OUR LAWNMOWER SHE WILL THINK I AM GOING BONKERS.THE LAWNMOWER IS 3 YEARS OLD ITS NOT THE MONEY ITS THE FACT THAT MY F-CKING STUPID RUSSIAN NEIGHBOR SAW A NIGERIAN STEAL MY MOWER AND HE JUST STANDS THERE THANKS A F-CKING LOT YURI.THE FRONT OF THE YARD IS HALF DONE NOW WHAT DO I DO.WHY ARE PEOPLE SO STUPID SOMEBODY PLEASE ANSWER ME THIS.I CANT BELIEVE IT I DONT LIKE TO GET ROBBED EVEN IF IT WAS A 6 PACK OF MY CORONAS ITS THE FACT THAT A LITTLE F-CKING BONE HEAD WALKED ONTO MY PROPERTY AND STOLE MY LAWNMOWER WHAT F-CKING BALLS.I CAN SEE IT NOW JIM HOW COME YOU DIDNT FINISH THE LAWN TODAY WELL HONEY I WENT IN TO TALK TO THE SHRINK,SICK GAMBLER,DIMEPLAYERONLY,AND LOU DIAMOND THEN WHEN I WENT BACK OUTSIDE SOMEBODY STOLE THE MOWER,I THINK SHE WILL HAVE ME COMMITTED TO THE MASSACHUSETTS INSTITUTION OF MENTAL PATIENTS BOYS HOW DO YOU EXPLAIN TO HER I TOOK A BREAK TO GO ON THE INTERNET TO TALK TO A BUNCH OF MIS FITS AND THE MOWER WAS STOLEN,THATS IT NO ALLOWANCE AGAIN THIS WEEK ILL HAVE TO GO BUY A NEW LAWNMOWER AND MY WIFE WILL DEDUCT IT FROM MY WEEKLY SALARY.WHY DO I COME INTO THIS FORUM EVERYTIME I DO SOMETHING BAD HAPPENS.
BOYS I HOPE YOU NEVER HAVE RUSSIAN NEIGHBORS MAN THEY ARE THE DUMBEST PEOPLE ON EARTH I SAW A BLACK KID TAKE THE MOWER I THOUGHT HE WAS A FRIEND OF YOURS F-CK YOU YURI
very nice story..... happy gobble gobble day for everyone..
speaking of classic stories i read a story by the FAMOUS COACH (JJ GOLD) about his meeting of fellow posters for a night at the meadowlands,,,,,, itwas the funniest story i have ever read (at majorwager)
COACH IF you see this thread can you please copy and paste that story here at the rx. its a great holiday story.
if you do i promise i will get you a lady for the night in vegas my treat
at the RX. BASH ........................ its on me
happy thanksgiving coach.
kid:drink: :drink:
speaking of classic stories i read a story by the FAMOUS COACH (JJ GOLD) about his meeting of fellow posters for a night at the meadowlands,,,,,, itwas the funniest story i have ever read (at majorwager)
COACH IF you see this thread can you please copy and paste that story here at the rx. its a great holiday story.
if you do i promise i will get you a lady for the night in vegas my treat
at the RX. BASH ........................ its on me
happy thanksgiving coach.
kid:drink: :drink:
Very funny post........Top 3 forsure.....
Had a busy day with work, I had my thanksgiving a couple weeks ago being from Canada and all...
I know this is all in fun.BUCS...Im a pretty easy going guy in real life, I just get a bit worked up about wagering...lol.. Theres some solid people here at the RX and look forward to meeting you guys in Vegas next year.... I Hope you and your families have a nice holiday.....
PRJ
Had a busy day with work, I had my thanksgiving a couple weeks ago being from Canada and all...
I know this is all in fun.BUCS...Im a pretty easy going guy in real life, I just get a bit worked up about wagering...lol.. Theres some solid people here at the RX and look forward to meeting you guys in Vegas next year.... I Hope you and your families have a nice holiday.....
PRJ
4256 Jr.....Its all about fun and learning here...when I host a lunch at the Nugget do you want to sit next to Ken or across the table? The only thing we will have to fight about in August is baseball....and Wiffle Ball....and golf. I am thinking about getting a ping-pong table in my suite if Dante and Glenda approve? I only wish Angel could play?
Bucs,
A few questions ..
Did DrContentWhoreOnly ask for a bonus on his portion size?
Did you make sure GameFarce left his 12 gauge in his rusty pick-up? I heard he was in Wisconsin recently.
Did VVV bring the wine or the whine?
Can I switch seats? I do not feel comfortable having Dante play footsie.
Thanks And Happy Turkey Day.
A few questions ..
Did DrContentWhoreOnly ask for a bonus on his portion size?
Did you make sure GameFarce left his 12 gauge in his rusty pick-up? I heard he was in Wisconsin recently.
Did VVV bring the wine or the whine?
Can I switch seats? I do not feel comfortable having Dante play footsie.
Thanks
And Happy Turkey Day.
HERE IS THAT CLASSIC STORY FROM JJ GOLD
...............LOL
arty:
<HR style="COLOR: #fdde82" SIZE=1> <!-- / icon and title --><!-- message -->
Boys it was such a weird experience meeting these 3 clowns last night at the track. I mean it was like I was on Earth and the other three were on fukkin Mars or in their own worlds. It starts out like real normal and we all are shaking hands, ect. I call the guys whatever name comes to my head like hey Danny, hey Rod, ect. So it goes all well there and then we proceed to our seats.
Now this guy Raisencain must be a bigshot there because he gets us the best seats in the house in a reserved box and has food already paid before we even it. What a class act and a generous guy. More later on this guy and the Nut he really turned out to be. I thought we were there to bet some races and talk a little but mainly gamble. I have fukkin roll of a sharks cash in my pocket ready to bet big numbers at Penn National but little did I know it was like the twilight zone instead.
We start with Total Square and this guy has 2 cell phones, 1 pager and get this a mini pocket fukkin web browser!!!! I thought he would want to get away for a night without all the tecno ****, ect. I would try and ask this guy “who do you like in the 2nd at Penn National and I had to ask him 4 fukiin times until he heard me and get this his reply was” It is all business JJ”” I had no fukkin clue if this guy was smoking weed or drinking. He did not hear a fukkin word I said. All he did was go on the pocket browser and stare at his sportspager all night and made a few calls in between. I waited like 20 minutes and this guy did not say word to any of us so I say to him “hey TS how is Bowmans”? I swear again he goes “JJ it is all business” I am just looking at this guy in bewilderment. I do of know what to make of him and he talks to me like he never hears a word I say(common theme developing boys) . This happens 7 times throughout the night when I tried to ask him a question and I kept getting the same answer. I say *** this clown and let me move on to Mjulian.
This Julian character always looks really concerned and is a deep thinker. When I would ask him something the look I would get is one of cloudiness and concern. He just starred at me kind of and then get this boys carries his fukkin bank books in his shirt pocket!!! He says to me” JJ I got 42 dimes in the bank.” It came out of the blue and had nothing to do what I was asking him. I do not give a *** how much this clown has in the bank, ect. I came here to talk to these guys about gambling and stuff and it appears they are in another fukkin world!! I then ask him “hey Julian what books do you use?” He then proceeds to tell me in 7 years he will be worth 450 Dimes. I am saying under my breathe “who gives a ***, this guy is nuts and out there”. He had to look at his bank books 20 times during the course of the night and kept shaking his head when he looked at it. He also sometimes would just yell out to the crowd “ All Rise” in a real deep voice like an opera singer and it was embarassing because everyone would stare at us. Again what the *** was on his mind??? I was starting to think I better get the *** out of here these guys are nuts and appeared to have snapped or something.!!!
Ok Raisencain seemed to be cool with the initial handshake and a little small talk about gambling so I figured I would pal around with this guy as we have more in common. Well boys this guy turned out to be the biggest nut and strangest character I know other than our own Peep. I would be looking at the tote board and I would hear whispers behind me in the next level of seats and it was Cain talking to some guys and he was whispering with his hand covering his mouth. I would then look back at him and he would stop suddenly and pretend to read the paper. What did this guy think?? I was born fukkin yesterday. He did not realize I was a street guy I guess . He did this all fukkin night and it was so annoying and every time I looked up at him he would stop and pretend to read the paper and like smile. This guys now I am thinking has fukkin snapped or is just nuts!!!! Boys it gets worse. Another strange thing about this guy is he always has a deck of cards in his hands and is doing tricks with them. I am shaking my head in disbelief going “what a fukkin jerkoff this guy is” and saying to my myself “what the *** am I doing here with these losers? I bet Cain always has card games going on the street and during the night when he was not whispering I asked him what was up his right sleeve because I saw something there. He pulls out a 4 of clubs and starts laughing so loud!! I swear I do not know if I should just run out of the fukkin track right then. I quietly backed away from this guy.
Ok boys time to leave and we all shake hands and **** and Mjulian puts some type of robe on (I had to turn my fukkin head and laugh because the thing was sooo ugly and outdated), Johhny (TS) get a load of this wears a fukkin tank top only in the pouring rain. I did not know what to make of it but just shake my head and praying to get the *** out. I shake hands with the two and they went their way in another direction and Cain parked in the same areas as me and he whispers to me “JJ I want to show you my car?? I am going what the ***???? Does this guy want to bang me on the side of the car??? I said what the *** if he tries something I can run and scream. He is wearing a long trench coat and a suite underneath. I thought he looked like an undertaker or something. During the walk to the car he keeps playing with this deck of cards and smiling to himself. Does this guy tell himself jokes or what?? What the ***?? Maybe he snapped???
Get to his car and boys he opens his trunk up and get a load of this….. The trunk is full of guns!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I swear I almost came in my pants!!!!! I love weapons and **** but I am discreet when I carry. I am going to Cain are you nuts??? This is a public parking lot and he is showing me all the guns he has and ****. He pulls out a brand new shotgun and shows me how to load it and cock it. He does this and starts laughing real loud and his eyes light up so much I thought he was coming. He starts pointing it at the sky and then starts yelling “Pow, Pow, Pow, Pow. That was the last fukkin straw and ran to my car and went home!!!! Sorry Cain but you have lost it.
Boys after last night I really do believe we are all sick fuks in one way or another and I mean everyone of us!!!
No more meeting posters for me, they are just tooooooooooooo far out there. I wonder why we all post day and night and live in glass houses. We are misfits and I am really starting to believe I just might be the top 5 “normal” posters here.
*** this ****
Gold
<!-- / message -->
...............LOL
arty: <HR style="COLOR: #fdde82" SIZE=1> <!-- / icon and title --><!-- message -->
Boys it was such a weird experience meeting these 3 clowns last night at the track. I mean it was like I was on Earth and the other three were on fukkin Mars or in their own worlds. It starts out like real normal and we all are shaking hands, ect. I call the guys whatever name comes to my head like hey Danny, hey Rod, ect. So it goes all well there and then we proceed to our seats.
Now this guy Raisencain must be a bigshot there because he gets us the best seats in the house in a reserved box and has food already paid before we even it. What a class act and a generous guy. More later on this guy and the Nut he really turned out to be. I thought we were there to bet some races and talk a little but mainly gamble. I have fukkin roll of a sharks cash in my pocket ready to bet big numbers at Penn National but little did I know it was like the twilight zone instead.
We start with Total Square and this guy has 2 cell phones, 1 pager and get this a mini pocket fukkin web browser!!!! I thought he would want to get away for a night without all the tecno ****, ect. I would try and ask this guy “who do you like in the 2nd at Penn National and I had to ask him 4 fukiin times until he heard me and get this his reply was” It is all business JJ”” I had no fukkin clue if this guy was smoking weed or drinking. He did not hear a fukkin word I said. All he did was go on the pocket browser and stare at his sportspager all night and made a few calls in between. I waited like 20 minutes and this guy did not say word to any of us so I say to him “hey TS how is Bowmans”? I swear again he goes “JJ it is all business” I am just looking at this guy in bewilderment. I do of know what to make of him and he talks to me like he never hears a word I say(common theme developing boys) . This happens 7 times throughout the night when I tried to ask him a question and I kept getting the same answer. I say *** this clown and let me move on to Mjulian.
This Julian character always looks really concerned and is a deep thinker. When I would ask him something the look I would get is one of cloudiness and concern. He just starred at me kind of and then get this boys carries his fukkin bank books in his shirt pocket!!! He says to me” JJ I got 42 dimes in the bank.” It came out of the blue and had nothing to do what I was asking him. I do not give a *** how much this clown has in the bank, ect. I came here to talk to these guys about gambling and stuff and it appears they are in another fukkin world!! I then ask him “hey Julian what books do you use?” He then proceeds to tell me in 7 years he will be worth 450 Dimes. I am saying under my breathe “who gives a ***, this guy is nuts and out there”. He had to look at his bank books 20 times during the course of the night and kept shaking his head when he looked at it. He also sometimes would just yell out to the crowd “ All Rise” in a real deep voice like an opera singer and it was embarassing because everyone would stare at us. Again what the *** was on his mind??? I was starting to think I better get the *** out of here these guys are nuts and appeared to have snapped or something.!!!
Ok Raisencain seemed to be cool with the initial handshake and a little small talk about gambling so I figured I would pal around with this guy as we have more in common. Well boys this guy turned out to be the biggest nut and strangest character I know other than our own Peep. I would be looking at the tote board and I would hear whispers behind me in the next level of seats and it was Cain talking to some guys and he was whispering with his hand covering his mouth. I would then look back at him and he would stop suddenly and pretend to read the paper. What did this guy think?? I was born fukkin yesterday. He did not realize I was a street guy I guess . He did this all fukkin night and it was so annoying and every time I looked up at him he would stop and pretend to read the paper and like smile. This guys now I am thinking has fukkin snapped or is just nuts!!!! Boys it gets worse. Another strange thing about this guy is he always has a deck of cards in his hands and is doing tricks with them. I am shaking my head in disbelief going “what a fukkin jerkoff this guy is” and saying to my myself “what the *** am I doing here with these losers? I bet Cain always has card games going on the street and during the night when he was not whispering I asked him what was up his right sleeve because I saw something there. He pulls out a 4 of clubs and starts laughing so loud!! I swear I do not know if I should just run out of the fukkin track right then. I quietly backed away from this guy.
Ok boys time to leave and we all shake hands and **** and Mjulian puts some type of robe on (I had to turn my fukkin head and laugh because the thing was sooo ugly and outdated), Johhny (TS) get a load of this wears a fukkin tank top only in the pouring rain. I did not know what to make of it but just shake my head and praying to get the *** out. I shake hands with the two and they went their way in another direction and Cain parked in the same areas as me and he whispers to me “JJ I want to show you my car?? I am going what the ***???? Does this guy want to bang me on the side of the car??? I said what the *** if he tries something I can run and scream. He is wearing a long trench coat and a suite underneath. I thought he looked like an undertaker or something. During the walk to the car he keeps playing with this deck of cards and smiling to himself. Does this guy tell himself jokes or what?? What the ***?? Maybe he snapped???
Get to his car and boys he opens his trunk up and get a load of this….. The trunk is full of guns!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I swear I almost came in my pants!!!!! I love weapons and **** but I am discreet when I carry. I am going to Cain are you nuts??? This is a public parking lot and he is showing me all the guns he has and ****. He pulls out a brand new shotgun and shows me how to load it and cock it. He does this and starts laughing real loud and his eyes light up so much I thought he was coming. He starts pointing it at the sky and then starts yelling “Pow, Pow, Pow, Pow. That was the last fukkin straw and ran to my car and went home!!!! Sorry Cain but you have lost it.
Boys after last night I really do believe we are all sick fuks in one way or another and I mean everyone of us!!!
No more meeting posters for me, they are just tooooooooooooo far out there. I wonder why we all post day and night and live in glass houses. We are misfits and I am really starting to believe I just might be the top 5 “normal” posters here.
*** this ****
Gold
<!-- / message -->
http://forum.therx.com/showthread.php?t=204833&highlight=grandma
There you go Teddy...
Some of the material is "dated", i had to remember who i was actually talking about....LOL
There you go Teddy...
Some of the material is "dated", i had to remember who i was actually talking about....LOL
