Party night 1988...I'd met this great girl (Betina) who I invite to a party at a friends house.
On the way we pick up a few bottles of wine..we're both nervous (first date) she starts drinking as soon as we hit the party then completely disappears from the festivities ... I go outside to make sure her car is still there..I look all over the house casually ...She's gone, I'm a little bummed but I continue on with the party. After a few hours the host comes to me and says.."I found your date, she in the basement " and "she's thrown up"..Somehow she found her way into his basement passed out and had barfed red wine all over her white outfit...How I'm responsible for getting her out of the party without making his upstairs look like a goat murder had happened....lots of white stuff in this house...I decide to carry her outside up the dark side of the house in the rain to avoid going through the party with what looks like a murder victim .... I start my way up the hill it's completely dark, I've picked her up and am cradling her, it's slippery and I'm about to step in a deep hole. (my buddy had been digging a drain pipe on the side of his house) I fall in the hole.. body slam my date I land on top of her hard body to body...
All I hear is what sounds like a huge fart...No, worst. ...I've pounded a major shit outa her with the body slam.
I'm like WTF..I sorta laugh thinking she just farted...Once I get her in the car I realize whats happened..she shit in her pants or I've body slammed a shit in her pants... I'm like "It's Okay I know whats happened" she keep mumbling "I don't know what you're talking about"..She too fucked up to take back to her house so we go to mine...I finally get her to my place start the shower for her..she's sorta coming around. I give her a bag for her shit stained clothing and tell her I can run her pants in the washer but she needs to get undressed and wash off...she mumbles and locks the bathroom door..I'm again like WTF.. after 20 mins of the shower running I knock..Nothing, knock again.. nothing. finally I brake the lock , she's passed out in the shower fully clothed ... I get her up undress her wet, wash her ass and body put a tee shirt on her and put her in the guest bedroom...I'd never ever seen this women nude, kissed her... nothing.
Cutting a long story short..we dated for 5 years after that night and I never ever saw her that drunk again.