The official holiday "I'm gonna kill my mother in law" thread

[Holysmoke+]

I was cutting something with a machete and I looked over at my mother in law and the thought crossed my mind to plant the fvking thing in her skull.

I fucking hate this bitch.

and if me and my brother in law don't come to blows this week, it will be a miracle

 

[oatmealpancakes]

Why do you hate her?

Mine's alright. Except she always wants 'us' to go to church with her on Christmas Eve. FUCK THAT SHIT. WHat, am I supposed to stay up and watch for santy claus too? Jesus keerrriissst, got MNF on tonight.

 

[DimeBag]

Mine is cool, the fact that she works for the Costarican equivilent of the FBI is kinda a drag though.

 

[mlfp]

You were cutting something with a machete?

 

[Holysmoke+]

yup

 

[mlfp]

Well, happy holidays.

 

[Holysmoke+]

u2

 

[blueedwards]

yup

was it trevor berbick?

 

[PBR]

I had the old chainsaw fired up last night carving the ham and the same thing went through my mind with my mother-in-law being there in close proximity. Not because I hate her or anything, but because my wife was filming the proceedings and I thought it would have made some compelling video for the RR.

 

[DonMelchor]

I had the old chainsaw fired up last night carving the ham and the same thing went through my mind with my mother-in-law being there in close proximity. Not because I hate her or anything, but because my wife was filming the proceedings and I thought it would have made some compelling video for the RR.

You can still hire a bum on the street, and serve the same purpose<?xml:namespace prefix = o ns = "urn:schemas-microsoft-comfficeffice" /><o></o>

 

[TheMailman]

As much as I would like to do the old crow in (as she called the locals on me for a domestic a &b. never charged though) she is now rotting in a nursing home. So to do her in would end her suffering( screw that) let her rot there and suffer for the next 20 years. She deserves every second of pain she gets. Only if there was some way I could bribe the staff there to occasionally forget her meds. Ha ha ha ha. I hate her

 

[Kornholio]

^ You are a very sick individual. I imagine you are the one that deserves the suffering you wish upon her.

 

[eoghater]

scumbag.

 

[Barakuda]

My mother in law is allright... she really stays away and doesn't bust my balls at all with anything... so maybe i don't have to wack her. My problem is a little more complex than that... it is my wife's sisters, she has 4 of them. They are all real cool and nice.... and two of them are really, really hot (18 & 23 years old). My problem is that everytime we have a get together or some type of party i am almost certain that the 2 hot ones want a little Barakuda shake with their meal. This has happened over and over again... where i get clear signals to make my move, by either of them but i still haven't acted upon any of the insignuations because it would probably send me and my marriage straight to hell. Has anybody been in this situation before... what to do?

 

[mlfp]

My mother in law is allright... she really stays away and doesn't bust my balls at all with anything... so maybe i don't have to wack her. My problem is a little more complex than that... it is my wife's sisters, she has 4 of them. They are all real cool and nice.... and two of them are really, really hot (18 & 23 years old). My problem is that everytime we have a get together or some type of party i am almost certain that the 2 hot ones want a little Barakuda shake with their meal. This has happened over and over again... where i get clear signals to make my move, by either of them but i still haven't acted upon any of the insignuations because it would probably send me and my marriage straight to hell. Has anybody been in this situation before... what to do?

Just do it, it will be fun to hear how you tried to make a move on one of your sister-in-laws and they immediately told your wife that they ran the trap play successfully. Stop staring at yourself in the mirror so much while you're at it.

 

[BronxCheer+]

My mother in law is allright... she really stays away and doesn't bust my balls at all with anything... so maybe i don't have to wack her. My problem is a little more complex than that... it is my wife's sisters, she has 4 of them. They are all real cool and nice.... and two of them are really, really hot (18 & 23 years old). My problem is that everytime we have a get together or some type of party i am almost certain that the 2 hot ones want a little Barakuda shake with their meal. This has happened over and over again... where i get clear signals to make my move, by either of them but i still haven't acted upon any of the insignuations because it would probably send me and my marriage straight to hell. Has anybody been in this situation before... what to do?

I've had it before and the best thing to do is look the other way, anything can happen but if you care about your wife then don't do anything cause she WILL find out, trust me on that one

 

[Barakuda]

Just do it, it will be fun to hear how you tried to make a move on one of your sister-in-laws and they immediately told your wife that they ran the trap play successfully. Stop staring at yourself in the mirror so much while you're at it.

I am well aware of the "trap play", and at times like now... with a clear head i can tell you that i will make it my goal 100% to avoid the trap and stay out of trouble.

But once you're on the field, and you see what these girls are wearing flaunting it all over your face, with half exposed breastesses and tight asses dancing in front of you. You get the urge to defy reality, to try and beat the system, to go against all odds, and think maybe, one of them won't tell on you.

Big New Year's party today at my house... let's see how it goes... i'll probably be in trouble before midnight. I don't think even home field advantage can save me today....
:smoker2:

 

[Kornholio]

I am well aware of the "trap play", and at times like now... with a clear head i can tell you that i will make it my goal 100% to avoid the trap and stay out of trouble.

But once you're on the field, and you see what these girls are wearing flaunting it all over your face, with half exposed breastesses and tight asses dancing in front of you. You get the urge to defy reality, to try and beat the system, to go against all odds, and think maybe, one of them won't tell on you.

Big New Year's party today at my house... let's see how it goes... i'll probably be in trouble before midnight. I don't think even home field advantage can save me today....
:smoker2:

You don't deserve your wife...seriously.

 

[Barakuda]

You don't deserve your wife...seriously.

Grow some balls, you are missing the point completely.

 

[mlfp]

Grow some balls, you are missing the point completely.

Enjoy the end of your marriage, even if you don't do anything you're doomed from here on.