I know you said you were kidding but I don’t think the Big East has done all that well for the supposed greatest conference of all time.
Having 2 of the 4 Final Four teams isnt some unusual feat - just going back to 2000 - the ACC, Big 10 and Big 12 each did it twice and SEC once
All the Big East teams had high seeds, so they should have all advanced pretty far, West Virginia lost 1st round so I give them an F.
Louisville crushed 2 low seeds, were losing late to Siena and then were blasted by the first good team they faced Mich St. Not very good showing from the top seed, I will give them a C-
Marquette escaped 1st round by a point and then lost. C-
Syracuse beat 2 lower seeds and then lost, C+
Pitt struggled to win their 3 games, and then lost a buzzer beater, I will give them a B since they were so close
UConn has won and covered each game so hard to fault them, although their margin of victory has gone down each game unlike UNC for instance who is winning every game by double digits. A-
Villanova has the 2 crush jobs over UCLA and Duke and a Final 4 . A+++
So out of their 7 teams, 2 have been good, Pitt was close and the rest did nothing special.