Harold is 95 and lives in a senior citizen home. Every night
> after dinner, Harold goes to a secluded garden behind the
> center to sit and ponder his accomplishments and long life.
> One evening, Mildred, age 87, wanders into the garden. They
> begin to chat, and before they know it, several hours have
> passed. After a short lull in their conversation Harold turns
> to Mildred and asks, "Do you know what I miss most of all?"
>
> She asks, "What?"
>
> "SEX!" he replies.
>
> Mildred exclaims, "Why you old fart, you couldn't get it up
> if I held a gun to your head!"
>
> "I know," Harold says, "but it would be nice if a woman could
> just hold it for a while."
>
> "Well, I can oblige," says Mildred, who unzips his trousers,
> removes his manhood and proceeds to hold it. Afterward, they
> agree to meet secretly each night in the garden where they
> would sit and talk and Mildred would hold Harold's manhood.
>
> Then, one night, Harold didn't show up at their usual meeting
> place. Alarmed, Mildred decided to find Harold and make sure
> he was O.K. She walked around the senior citizen home where
> she found him sitting by the pool with another female resident,
> Ethel, who was holding Harold's manhood.
>
> Furious, Mildred yelled, "You two-timing creep! What does Ethel
> have that I don't have?"
>
> Old Harold smiled happily and replied, "Parkinson's."
>
> after dinner, Harold goes to a secluded garden behind the
> center to sit and ponder his accomplishments and long life.
> One evening, Mildred, age 87, wanders into the garden. They
> begin to chat, and before they know it, several hours have
> passed. After a short lull in their conversation Harold turns
> to Mildred and asks, "Do you know what I miss most of all?"
>
> She asks, "What?"
>
> "SEX!" he replies.
>
> Mildred exclaims, "Why you old fart, you couldn't get it up
> if I held a gun to your head!"
>
> "I know," Harold says, "but it would be nice if a woman could
> just hold it for a while."
>
> "Well, I can oblige," says Mildred, who unzips his trousers,
> removes his manhood and proceeds to hold it. Afterward, they
> agree to meet secretly each night in the garden where they
> would sit and talk and Mildred would hold Harold's manhood.
>
> Then, one night, Harold didn't show up at their usual meeting
> place. Alarmed, Mildred decided to find Harold and make sure
> he was O.K. She walked around the senior citizen home where
> she found him sitting by the pool with another female resident,
> Ethel, who was holding Harold's manhood.
>
> Furious, Mildred yelled, "You two-timing creep! What does Ethel
> have that I don't have?"
>
> Old Harold smiled happily and replied, "Parkinson's."
>
