These requests give me a kick. Nigeria's official government language is English being a former British colony, yet the supposed Director of Finance of Agriculture speaks with this horrendous English:
I DR DANSUKI DAN , PRESENTLY THE DIRECTOR OF THE
FINANCE IN THE FEDERAL MINISTRY OF AGRICULTURE
HEADQUARTERS , LAGOS NIGERIA
I AM IN NEED OF YOUR GENUINE ASSISTANT AND TRUST
BECAUSE AS A TOP OFFICIAL OF RULING GORVERNMENT, I
WANT TO SAFE GAURD MY INTEREST IN YOUR COUNTRY
BEFORE THE END OF THE TENUREOF THIS ADMINITRATION,
MORE ALSO WE AS CIVIL SERVANT ARE FORBIDDEN TO OWN
OR OPERATE ACCOUNT HENCE A FOREIGNER IS NEEDED.
I PRESENTLY HAVE AN OVER INVOLCED CONTRACT PAYMENT OF
USD38.5M(THIRTY-EIGHT FIVE HUNDREN THOUSAND US
DOLLAR) WHICH HAS REMAIN UNCLAIMED SINCE 1997.MY
SUPERIOR IN THIS PRESENDENCY HAVE MANDATE ME TO
PRESENT A NONEST FOREIGNER WHO CAN
CONVENIENLYPROJECT THIS FUND FOR US IN HIS BANK
ACCOUNT IN HIS COUNTRY. I SINCERELY BELIEVE THAT YOU
CAN BE OF GREAT ASSISTANCE TO US. THIS IS WHY I AM
CONTACTING YOU AND ALSO REQUESTING FOR YOUR
DISCRETION,MATURITY AND CO-0PORATION.
MY SUPERIORS HAS COMPLETED ALL ADMINISTRATIVE STEPS
TO SEE THAT THIS FUND RECEIVES ALL THE REQUEST
APPROVALS IMMEDIATELY YOU GIVE ME THE GO AHEAD.
ALL I NEED FROM YOU ARE THE FOLLOWING.
(1) BANK ACCOUNT NUMBER
(2) NAME AND FULL ADDRESS OF YOUR NORMINATED WITH
TELEPHONE AND FAX NUMBERS
(3) YOUR PRIVATE TELEPHONE AND FAX NUMBERS FOR EASY
COMMUNICATION BE! TWEEN US.
I SHALL SEND YOU BY FAX DETAIL OF THE CONTRACT
EXECUTED SOON AFTER I RECEIVE YOUR FAX MESSAGE. YOU
WILL BE ENTITLED TO 30% FO THE TOTAL FUND
IMMEDIATELY WE ARRIVE YOUR COUNTRY FOR SHARING. 10%
WILL COVER ALL MISCALLANEOUS EXPENSES WE SHALL DO
BOTH HERE AND IN YOUR COUNTRY. PLEASE ENDEAVOUR TO> REACH
ME FOR MORE DETAIL. DO NOT HESITATE TO SEND ME
A FAX MESSAGE AND CALL AS SOON AS POSSIBLE. I
SINCERELY COUNT ON YOUR ASSISTANCE.REMEMBER .I AM
HIGHLY PLACED OFFICIAL AND EXPECT ABSOLUTE
DISCRETION FROM YOU IN ORDER TO PROTECT OUR HONOUR
FROM FOREIGN JOURNALIST WHO SEEK TO DESTROY MEMBER
OF OUR RULING CIVILIAN GORVERNMENT
THIS TRANSACTION IS HITCH-FREE, SO YOU NEED NOT
ENTERTAIN ANY FEAR AT ALL.
I EXPECT YOUR REPLY IMMEDIATELY.
BEST REGARDS,
DR DANSUKI DAN
Can someone help the poor guy out?
I DR DANSUKI DAN , PRESENTLY THE DIRECTOR OF THE
FINANCE IN THE FEDERAL MINISTRY OF AGRICULTURE
HEADQUARTERS , LAGOS NIGERIA
I AM IN NEED OF YOUR GENUINE ASSISTANT AND TRUST
BECAUSE AS A TOP OFFICIAL OF RULING GORVERNMENT, I
WANT TO SAFE GAURD MY INTEREST IN YOUR COUNTRY
BEFORE THE END OF THE TENUREOF THIS ADMINITRATION,
MORE ALSO WE AS CIVIL SERVANT ARE FORBIDDEN TO OWN
OR OPERATE ACCOUNT HENCE A FOREIGNER IS NEEDED.
I PRESENTLY HAVE AN OVER INVOLCED CONTRACT PAYMENT OF
USD38.5M(THIRTY-EIGHT FIVE HUNDREN THOUSAND US
DOLLAR) WHICH HAS REMAIN UNCLAIMED SINCE 1997.MY
SUPERIOR IN THIS PRESENDENCY HAVE MANDATE ME TO
PRESENT A NONEST FOREIGNER WHO CAN
CONVENIENLYPROJECT THIS FUND FOR US IN HIS BANK
ACCOUNT IN HIS COUNTRY. I SINCERELY BELIEVE THAT YOU
CAN BE OF GREAT ASSISTANCE TO US. THIS IS WHY I AM
CONTACTING YOU AND ALSO REQUESTING FOR YOUR
DISCRETION,MATURITY AND CO-0PORATION.
MY SUPERIORS HAS COMPLETED ALL ADMINISTRATIVE STEPS
TO SEE THAT THIS FUND RECEIVES ALL THE REQUEST
APPROVALS IMMEDIATELY YOU GIVE ME THE GO AHEAD.
ALL I NEED FROM YOU ARE THE FOLLOWING.
(1) BANK ACCOUNT NUMBER
(2) NAME AND FULL ADDRESS OF YOUR NORMINATED WITH
TELEPHONE AND FAX NUMBERS
(3) YOUR PRIVATE TELEPHONE AND FAX NUMBERS FOR EASY
COMMUNICATION BE! TWEEN US.
I SHALL SEND YOU BY FAX DETAIL OF THE CONTRACT
EXECUTED SOON AFTER I RECEIVE YOUR FAX MESSAGE. YOU
WILL BE ENTITLED TO 30% FO THE TOTAL FUND
IMMEDIATELY WE ARRIVE YOUR COUNTRY FOR SHARING. 10%
WILL COVER ALL MISCALLANEOUS EXPENSES WE SHALL DO
BOTH HERE AND IN YOUR COUNTRY. PLEASE ENDEAVOUR TO> REACH
ME FOR MORE DETAIL. DO NOT HESITATE TO SEND ME
A FAX MESSAGE AND CALL AS SOON AS POSSIBLE. I
SINCERELY COUNT ON YOUR ASSISTANCE.REMEMBER .I AM
HIGHLY PLACED OFFICIAL AND EXPECT ABSOLUTE
DISCRETION FROM YOU IN ORDER TO PROTECT OUR HONOUR
FROM FOREIGN JOURNALIST WHO SEEK TO DESTROY MEMBER
OF OUR RULING CIVILIAN GORVERNMENT
THIS TRANSACTION IS HITCH-FREE, SO YOU NEED NOT
ENTERTAIN ANY FEAR AT ALL.
I EXPECT YOUR REPLY IMMEDIATELY.
BEST REGARDS,
DR DANSUKI DAN
Can someone help the poor guy out?
