Have you ever dated a crazy babe (bitch) that almost killed you?

[ML Dog]

Yes, a Rite of Passage.

No Doubt Whatsoever.

And dudes would do well to see that. Hella hard to see it when one is chasing you with a knife or pegging you in the head with cleaning supplies but Guys would do well to realize ASAP that dealing with Crazy Chicks is to The Mind what squats on the Smith Machine is to the legs and butt. Developmental. Makes a Guy Stronger. Plus makes more possible detouring around later Crazy Chicks.

 

[HarryCaray]

Some great stories ITT

 

[StevieRay]

At the beach one Oct. had $$ on AU vs Fla. crazy drunk ass girl that went with me was out on balcony. Six floors up, saying the whales were telling her I didn't love her , told her she should listen to them , kept saying she was gonna jump, I asked her to at least wait till the game was over

Mathis is the one that slashed my tires bty

 

[Betallsports]

No Vlad in this Thread ?? Hmm :grandmais

 

[pocketrockets]

Most likely she was lying to you; just trying to fuck with your mind out of spite.

No shit she was lying, it worked... I was very stressed during those 2 months

 

[pocketrockets]

5 years ago I went to Mexico with this chick, who is considered one of the most insane chicks in the whole alternative scene down here in CR (it's a small country+small scene)... chick is tattoed and has done some modeling/appeared in 2 music videos... I would post pics but she would kill me if I'm discovered NO DOUBT. I was crazy for this chick (was pretty stupid at the time) so I paid for her trip and day 1 was ok... she did threw a fit cause I did coke the 1st nite lol (and she loves that shit). Day 2 we went to the the castle in Chapultepec and the zoo... I had to take a crap and she was pissed cause I was delaying her experience... so fuck her... I wasn't amused... we went to a concert of her favorite band and we managed to meet the guys and I took pics of her with the guys, etc... that was day 2.

On day 3 we went to an artsy party in the DF... awesome apartment, lots of chicks and drugs... I was already pissed and wasnt tolerating much of her shit, she wanted to leave the party to go to a bar and she managed to get our Mexican buddy arrested cause he was drunk driving to please her (we were staying at his place). She came back to the party to tell the tale and I said fuck this and got angry at her... I nice looking chick that worked at Televisa told me to forget about the bitch and wanted to fuck me so we started making out, at the same time the chick was making out with some 5'2'' that gave her blow, ugliest fucker ive ever seen... around 5am we were trying to convince her to leave and try to bail our friend... guess what... she wanted to keep partying with the midget, BUT wanted to take her stuff with her, so we were walking to the car and the midget came along, grinning while I was arguing with the crazy bitch... I tell the midget no way in hell he's getting in the car... he gets in... I proceed to get out, throw my leather jacket across the street and take him out and knocked him down with two blows. Chick comes screaming at me telling me she is sick of me for ruining her trip? slapped me and scratched me... didnt hit her... but was close.

The bitch left with the groggy midget and I left with the mexican tv chick... stayed in a motel for the 3 remaining nites of the trip and she stayed with the midget... we met at the airplane and I changed sits... it was very awkward cause somehow the airport teller told her my new sit was her sit... had to tell her to GTFO.

 

[aclv1]

Not as bad as your stories but here goes.

Was going out with this girl from Jersey, things were going great the first month . We only went to each others places, never even realized we are never in public together ,just a fuck fest everyday.

So one day we go to wawa together to get something to eat. I wanted a small chicken noodle soup also so I went to the computer thing and printed out my order. So far so good...we go to pay then we go back to get the soup.

The girl who was making the order was HOT with HUGE . She was smiling at me and didnt even look at my girl. I can see my girl was getting jelouse. Her face was turning red .

So then the wawa girl says I am sorry but we dont have any more chicken noodle soup , would you like chicken corn chowder? You ordered a small but I can give you a large free. I said sure thank you very much I appreciate it.

Before I could take another step my girl grabs the hot soup opens the fuckin lid and throws it in my face, takes a swipe at my bag and everything falls out and walks out of the store calling me a fuckin dickhead.

I go outside, she is waiting for me by my car with arms folded. I get in , she gets in , I drop her off at her place not even a word said between us .

She calls the next day and says HI.

 

[aclv1]

My bad for the post , I didnt read the entire title .... no life threatening incidents with me so far

 

[tanner12oz]

I kinda like crazy girls. I have my shit together and my life is pretty boring so I think I seek them out to spice things up. I've been threatened with knives, had my car vandalized, locked myself in rooms to protect myself from carnage. Those girls are better then the stalkers, I'm pregnant, kill myself crazy types.

 

[pocketrockets]

My bad for the post , I didnt read the entire title .... no life threatening incidents with me so far

Still a "good" story... You should have come back to ask the big out

 

[CoachCB]

When I was 21 I had just come back to Jacksonville from Operation Desert Storm (1991). Before I left I was fucking a couple of different girls....and wrote letters to them while I was gone. When I got back I told both that I didn't want to see them. These girls knew each other but weren't friendly or hung out, they had some mutual friends. I'm out one night and I run into a girl who knew both of them...she had fucked a buddy of mine a few years earlier. Anyhow, we're at a popular bar and the 2 other girls show up (separately, with their own group of friends). I end up taking the girl home and while I'm hittin' it the bedroom light comes on. I turn around and BOTH of the girls are standing there. I look back at the girl I'm screwing and she says, "Do something!" I get up and yell, "Get the fuck out!" One of the girls was cooperative and just headed towards the front door....the other one said, "Fuck that bitch! I'm kicking her ass!" I ended up picking her up and carrying her outside (while she was kicking and screaming). I yelled for my roommate to wake up (he left the front door unlocked which is how they got in in the first place). When I go to put the screaming chick down she puts me in a head lock. So, there I am....buck naked in the parking lot in a head lock. I tell her to let me go....she says, "Fuck you!" She was hanging on for dear life....so I pushed her and she goes rolling through the parking lot while I fall backwards. She comes running at me and my roommate grabs her. She wouldn't leave so we called the cops. The cops got there and my roommate told them what happened. They asked for me to come to the door and the lead cop goes, "Are you Chris?" I said yes...and the younger cop looks at me with a grin and shakes his head. They said, we can arrest them for trespassing or escort them off the property. I told them to just get them the hell out of there!

I ended up fucking both of those girls at least 10 more times each (in fact, one of them I banged about 5 years ago!). I never fucked the girl that was in bed that night again though.....sadly.

Pretty crazy shit Stevie Ray FFS.

8 years ago I started fucking an English teacher from a private college, redhead, short hair, glasses... the whole fantasy look. 1st day I met her we fucked... she took her clothes off and was tattoed all over her back and legs... very good lay!! But I wass interested in someone else so when I told her it wasn't gonna get serious she threw a fit in the middle of the bar we were drinking at... Bumped into her couple days later and she asked for some coke, gave her the baggie and then she threw the bomb... she said her ex was bi and he had recently been diagnosed with AIDS, and that she might have it too and since we fucked without a rubber I could have it too... then she left and stole my coke lmao.

I proceeded to drink 5 jagger shots immediately.

Dude, I just laughed out loud! If this is a true story I feel for you!

 

[pocketrockets]

When I was 21 I had just come back to Jacksonville from Operation Desert Storm (1991). Before I left I was fucking a couple of different girls....and wrote letters to them while I was gone. When I got back I told both that I didn't want to see them. These girls knew each other but weren't friendly or hung out, they had some mutual friends. I'm out one night and I run into a girl who knew both of them...she had fucked a buddy of mine a few years earlier. Anyhow, we're at a popular bar and the 2 other girls show up (separately, with their own group of friends). I end up taking the girl home and while I'm hittin' it the bedroom light comes on. I turn around and BOTH of the girls are standing there. I look back at the girl I'm screwing and she says, "Do something!" I get up and yell, "Get the fuck out!" One of the girls was cooperative and just headed towards the front door....the other one said, "Fuck that bitch! I'm kicking her ass!" I ended up picking her up and carrying her outside (while she was kicking and screaming). I yelled for my roommate to wake up (he left the front door unlocked which is how they got in in the first place). When I go to put the screaming chick down she puts me in a head lock. So, there I am....buck naked in the parking lot in a head lock. I tell her to let me go....she says, "Fuck you!" She was hanging on for dear life....so I pushed her and she goes rolling through the parking lot while I fall backwards. She comes running at me and my roommate grabs her. She wouldn't leave so we called the cops. The cops got there and my roommate told them what happened. They asked for me to come to the door and the lead cop goes, "Are you Chris?" I said yes...and the younger cop looks at me with a grin and shakes his head. They said, we can arrest them for trespassing or escort them off the property. I told them to just get them the hell out of there!

I ended up fucking both of those girls at least 10 more times each (in fact, one of them I banged about 5 years ago!). I never fucked the girl that was in bed that night again though.....sadly.



Dude, I just laughed out loud! If this is a true story I feel for you!

It was, sadly, true... looking back I wish I gave that redhead storyteller a cumshot in the eye. And your story is freaking crazy! Women are dangerous.

 

[ML Dog]

groggy midget.

Goes without saying that a few guys here'll use this term hereafter. Thanks. :toast: Some guys will be anxious to do so, I was. So I went to the QuikTrip bought a couple Mickey's 40 ouncers downed the 1st in the adjacent AutoZone parking lot. Several cool and useful boxes there plus found a whatever those silver things one uses to clamp hoses down with is...might be called a "clamp" went back to QT started in on the next 40 'n waited for a Midget to show up.

It went "OK", Mexican, The Midget ended up having 3 other Midgets in the Trucka with him, like a VW Clown Car they come pouring out, had to jump the wall into the Condos. Hid out at the Pool for awhile. Finished the 40.

Nearly lost it jumping that wall though. I did actually fall. landed on a RubberPlant actually. Good Karma there.

Gonna experiment with delivering the term in a British Accent next time. Has definite potential though. :toast:

stayed in a motel for the 3 remaining nites of the trip and she stayed with the midget

Midgets are always after your Woman. 100% of the time. No Exceptions.

Its why your Midget had that Coke. Midgets can't do Cocaine, they'd shoot off like a Bottle Rocket if they did. Combo of the Benzoylmethylecgonine Sulfate in the Coca when mixed with the higher density of neural connections into the hippocampus within The Midget cuz those have to be compressed into a smaller region (area) due to the lesser Total Mass (total area) inherent to The Midget in question.

You're ever out on a date with a Girl and you encounter a Midget, this to Guys In General of course, don't dally in getting your girl as far away from The Midget as possible cuz invariably there is only one thing on their mind, Singular Focus Singular GOAL on the part of The Midget.

 

[CaptainLee]

I've removed clips from handguns after arguing with crazy girlfriends several times for fear of being shot.

Be advised to keep alcohol away from women who have one drop of American Indian blood.

 

[Redagger029]

Whisky is a killer

 

[Willie99]

Girl threw a bottle of Mr. Clean at me from across the kitchen, pegged me right in the forehead impact of which caused the LID to come off and floor cleaner to get all over my head and even a bit into my eyes.

I remember actually (and amazingly I guess) not even being that upset cuz it was such an unbelievable shot. Plus not much got into my eyes, had closed them when I concluded "Holy Shit, that has a good chance." then BOOM. Mostly the FUMES was what messed with my eyes. My head was pretty well soaked with Mr. Clean.

Five foot 2 the girl me 6 foot Five her 12 feet away or so with a spontaneous heave of the Mr. Clean bottle?

Consider the angles involved, Rate of speed needful of being accomplished to dislodge that lid? Accuracy required and that she accomplished?

Perfect throw, right to the forehead with enough force to cause the lid to come off, noxious liquid to cover the head? Had to give it up to her.

Many a Sports Fan...Gambler would understand completely. Anger doused by pure admiration....amazement at the execution of the shot.

Thats just one of several...Same Girl, traveling from Cali to Indiana we get in a fight on the interstate she flees the car running down the middle of the freeway, van full of Mormons stop to rescue her I launch an unopened Miller High Life bottle at their van as it pulls away...again....I don't know what it was about this relationship but Throwing Accuracy was superb between her and I cuz I manage to hit the van directly in it's back window as it pulls off from the side of the freeway....where they'd stopped to let her get in...

Not sure if it broke the window out but it sure sounded like it did. Pretty sure it did. This was near St. George Utah, thats the Jail they took me to later...come to pass I had launched the Miller Beer bottle from Arizona but it had impacted the van's back window in UTAH....it flew over the State Line from the one state to the next. Took 4 hours of arguing amongst many different Police agencies to decide who was gonna book me....County & DPS from the AZ Side, City (St.George) & State maybe County as well from the Utah side.

Main complication though proved not to be the Interstate Beer Bottle toss (remarkable shot...flew at 40 yards through the air and thats probably being a bit conservative) but my Friend who was traveling with us was using a name that was nearly identical to that of a Serial Killer being hunted for in that area. His real first name + the fake last name he was using matched that Serial Killer's name exactly....when you put the two together. So we had to wait for The FBI to come out and also some other agency that showed up in Unmarked car....maybe ATF.

Interesting Day that one. I think dating Crazy Chicks is an important part of a Man's Journey.

nice, thanks for the laughs

 

[Willie99]

Whisky is a killer

funny

 

[ML Dog]

Be advised to keep alcohol away from women who have one drop of American Indian blood.

Thats actually fantastic advice. And especially Apaches. Its believed that there is Biological Reason for this, it is thought that the Native American lacks a Gene necessary to process the Alcohol. Or something like that. cause relating to actual DNA, Biological stuff. "Odd" because some tribes have Legends that The Great Spirit (basically "God" to some Tribes) forbids the use of alcohol....so begs the question of if they were "designed that way" sorta Chicken & The Egg thing...which came first: Great Spirit designed them like that or Legends grew from them lacking that Genome or whatever.

I'd take it farther even to say if one knowingly drinks with Native Americans and especially PERIOD, not just girls and especially certain Tribes (such as Apache) they should know what to expect. That person is very likely gonna become a total mess & very possibly violent.

Its so bad in fact that when I traveled near Gallup the stores there by The Rez would not sell alcohol if they thought you were buying for or even just gonna maybe drink with the Indians there.

Apaches over there...i think. Its been a while back now.

 

[Vlad the Impaler]

I have all kinds of stories. Remember last girl?? Can't find thread but lets just say at this very moment she is in court on a felony charge. I don't want her to go to prison but would like to see her on house arrest. It would drive her crazy but prison would make her go insane. Only girl I ever dated that 1. Has been to prison and 2. Never uses or really knows how to use a computer. On top of that, oldest girl by far and by really far I have ever dated. I have to take care of her unemployment which I am glad they cancelled because she missed an appointment. Not to mention, it has been since high school since I have had a girl's ex bf/ bf call me but her felon did. I pushed his buttons all over the place. Guy was a complete idiot.

 

[pocketrockets]

Goes without saying that a few guys here'll use this term hereafter. Thanks. :toast: Some guys will be anxious to do so, I was. So I went to the QuikTrip bought a couple Mickey's 40 ouncers downed the 1st in the adjacent AutoZone parking lot. Several cool and useful boxes there plus found a whatever those silver things one uses to clamp hoses down with is...might be called a "clamp" went back to QT started in on the next 40 'n waited for a Midget to show up.

It went "OK", Mexican, The Midget ended up having 3 other Midgets in the Trucka with him, like a VW Clown Car they come pouring out, had to jump the wall into the Condos. Hid out at the Pool for awhile. Finished the 40.

Nearly lost it jumping that wall though. I did actually fall. landed on a RubberPlant actually. Good Karma there.

Gonna experiment with delivering the term in a British Accent next time. Has definite potential though. :toast:




Midgets are always after your Woman. 100% of the time. No Exceptions.

Its why your Midget had that Coke. Midgets can't do Cocaine, they'd shoot off like a Bottle Rocket if they did. Combo of the Benzoylmethylecgonine Sulfate in the Coca when mixed with the higher density of neural connections into the hippocampus within The Midget cuz those have to be compressed into a smaller region (area) due to the lesser Total Mass (total area) inherent to The Midget in question.

You're ever out on a date with a Girl and you encounter a Midget, this to Guys In General of course, don't dally in getting your girl as far away from The Midget as possible cuz invariably there is only one thing on their mind, Singular Focus Singular GOAL on the part of The Midget.

Good stuff man, almost pissed myself.