Best or worst excuse for calling in sick

[DungBeetle]

One of our drivers had his daughter call in for him. The excuse was she was having a heavy flow day. No shit, the guy can't come to work because his daughter is having a bad period.

She is actually his 26 yr old step daughter from another marriage so we figure he's hittin it Woody Allen style.

Told her it would go into his personnel file just as she stated it & she said ok. :think2:

 

[billhill999]

I remember one guy calling in sick with Whooping Cough Disease.

 

[SmallDaddy]

One guy I knew called in sick because his pet rabbit died.

So we told him he should have made stew

 

[scanz]

No need to call in when u work for youself.

 

[Gritsn'Gravy]

Best and most disgusting request for an early out came from a female employee in her late 40's who told me she had to go because she had a yeast infection and could barely walk. She was very unattractive to begin with and had grey hair. All I could visualize was an Oak Ridge boy with some Wonder Bread between her thighs.

 

[quantumleap]

A guy I work with missed a day and told us he didn't leave voicemail with our Supervisor because "he hates to leave voicemail". He said he was so tired he kept hitting the snooze button over and over. By the time he got up his computer needed working on so instead of coming in to work late he worked on his computer.

hno:

I can't believe he thought we would believe him.

 

[JohnnyMac]

He should just say, "I'm banging my former step-daughter, and every once in a while, my conscience overwhelms me."

 

[lookin4awinner]

Calling in "SICK"... Does that exist????

When I got outta college in 1994 my 1st boss told me that me that the company I worked for has unlimited sick time for its employees BUT..... & I quote "dont ever try to use any because he would never OK it. Thus I would never get paid & I would be put on his list of cry-babies that call in sick" worked for that prick for like 6 yr. & got paid for 1 sick day when I got hit in the head & had a concusison. Dr. recommended 6 days rest but he would not allow that..... Trust me if I knew then what I know now that prick would be serving time in prison for the shit he pulled on employees such as myslef..... And furthermore that is an example of why we all get shit service at most all "COPORATE" & chian type stores. Some people are just shitty people & make shitty employees but may just get treated soooooo F'n poorly by thier boss & the boss of the boss & Human Resources etc. etc. they just stop caring altogether........

 

[donkeybucks]

I tell the truth and tell them I'm hungover. Only did this once but they didn't care. They know I get my shit done. I think once you prove yourself and get to know your superiors on a certain level they will cut you a break.

 

[DungBeetle]

haha ! pet rabbit ? wtf

One guy I knew called in sick because his pet rabbit died.

So we told him he should have made stew

 

[DungBeetle]

Had a boss just like that. Worked there 2 years, never called in sick because he would make your live miserable the next day. If I was sick I'd go in, work a while and then tell him I was going home, then he wasn't such an ass about it.

When I got outta college in 1994 my 1st boss told me that me that the company I worked for has unlimited sick time for its employees BUT..... & I quote "dont ever try to use any because he would never OK it. Thus I would never get paid & I would be put on his list of cry-babies that call in sick" worked for that prick for like 6 yr. & got paid for 1 sick day when I got hit in the head & had a concusison. Dr. recommended 6 days rest but he would not allow that..... Trust me if I knew then what I know now that prick would be serving time in prison for the shit he pulled on employees such as myslef..... And furthermore that is an example of why we all get shit service at most all "COPORATE" & chian type stores. Some people are just shitty people & make shitty employees but may just get treated soooooo F'n poorly by thier boss & the boss of the boss & Human Resources etc. etc. they just stop caring altogether........

 

[JakeT.]

I called in sick drunk because I forgot I had to work. That was fun.

 

[Doug]

I used up so much of my sick time at USPS, ( in 5.5 years there), That I had to send them a check, when I quit, to cover my advanced sick time....and I got a lot of sick time....but lost it , if I didn't use it.

 

[OnePocket]

Guy calls in sick, supervisor says whats wrong why you sick...He said I'm fucking my sister how sick is that? ? ?

 

[DungBeetle]

Guy calls in sick, supervisor says whats wrong why you sick...He said I'm fucking my sister how sick is that? ? ?

:lol: